Tuesday, January 29, 2019

No More Ice on Windscreen

If you want to wind up a friend [assuming you have any friends], tell them you know how to prevent ice on their windscreen - thus saving loads of time and aggro in the mornings:
  • Get some WHITE Vinegar. It must be white vinegar [This is the first wind-up: even white vinegar doesn't have white vinegar on the label. Plus, it's not white, it's clear.
  • Mix with water [why?, water freezes] to the ratio of three parts vinegar and one part water. [This is the second wind-up: What does all that mean?]
  • Decant the solution into a spray bottle [Wind-up number three: Who has a spray bottle? What is a spray bottle?].
  • Spray the mixture on the windscreen in the evening before the ice comes: In the morning you will have a windscreen entirely free from ice.
Of course, this load of old bollocks doesn't work.

The Brucie Bonus is your friend's car, in addition to being iced up, will smell like a chip shop.


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